Thursday, September 25, 2014

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I am tempted to write another piece on the encroaching "Christmas" holiday, particularly since my wife and I saw "Christmas" decorations in one of the stores we shopped at yesterday...right alongside Halloween decorations. (The juxtaposition seems poised to make some heads explode in this Buckle of the Bible Belt in which I live.) But I think I will not; I do not think I have much if anything to add to the earlier piece, unless it is in what I have said here and elsewhere. My hackles have not raised, whether because I am growing inured to the phenomenon or because I am too tired to do more than make the feeble observation, I know not and care not much more.

Since I am thinking about the holiday now only three months off, I have to think about Ms. 8 and how she will interact with it. I know it is a thing that can bring her little heart happiness, and I very much want my daughter to be happy, but it is also something that will immure her in consumerist trappings and appropriative, oppressive "religious" practices without my help, and I do not want her to be burdened by them any more than cannot be prevented. (I am under no illusions about my efficacy against the silent, tacit weight of dominant threads of popular culture.) So I am left with some concern as to how much to celebrate with her, and in what way.

The argument may well be floated that it will not matter at this point, since she will not be old enough to understand and will not remember what happens this year in any event. Both assertions may well be true. The latter, though, simply defers the problem. The former fails to understand that patterns established early continue to shape events and people, consciously and unconsciously, thereafter. Consider: what my wife and I have for Christmas décor is stored (if imperfectly) where it can be found. Any additions to it will be similarly stored. They can thus be found by Ms. 8 when she is old enough to understand and to ask questions (which I am convinced will be sooner than expected, but I would be convinced my daughter is unusually smart). She will be already embedded in some of the more...problematic aspects of the "celebration." And it is about that already-embeddedness that I worry.

I would like to "just be happy" about things. I would like to have uncomplicated joy with my little girl and with my wife. But I have the misfortune of being aware of--and indeed trained to seek--the implications of words and deeds, and many of them are far from happy. For me to neglect them would be irresponsible, and for me to ignore them as they apply to my daughter--and they cannot help but do so--would be far worse than that. Neither suggests itself as particularly acceptable. I do have some semblance of scruple, after all...

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